Body Bumper Cars Is a go! 5 Points for Slytherin!

In school, I'm not the perfect student at all or the worst either. There is something that I have learned, well noticed, that I have been doing more frequently. So, I'm now one of those people that does in fact turn in assignments late. It is in fact a habit that I have "learned" in the past year that is not a good trait for the academic life. It is a curse, a burden, a gift unwanted. For goodness sake, when you're in college, DO YOU HOMEWORK!

This week I had to do an assignment in speech that had to be about a traumatic experience in which I left the scene more knowledgeable. For some strange reason, I chose the time I got hit by a car on my college campus during the first semester of my freshman year. Who knew getting hit by a Beetle would hurt like HELL? Well here is the story that I tried to make as comical as possible. I hope you enjoy!

Bumper Car Friday

November 27th, 2012

I open up the scene on a dreary, dismal Friday morning. I was getting ready for an English vocabulary exam that I had in 40 minutes when I noticed that I had to get there before I could even take said test. Well my friends and family know that I’m not the person who is usually on time. Be as it may, I’m a casually late kind of guy. For class though, I tried to arrive 20-30 minutes early simply because missing class was not on my list of things to continuously do. I didn’t want to make it a habit that I’d then have to break. That being said, I grabbed my phone and backpack, slipped on my shoes and raced out the door to my bicycle. Before I rode my bike to class, each morning I would pop in my headphones to play music from my phone. I did that as usual and peddled from my house, past the frat house circle and onto main that led to the busiest part of campus. I traveled about a mile down to sidewalk to where a crosswalk intersected through the busy street. I pulled out my phone to check the time and noticed that I was going to be late if I didn’t hurry up. Granted I only lived 15 minutes from the English hall, I wasn’t too worried. I stopped before going across, so that the traffic flow would see my existence and let me pass. The lane closest to me, which was a jeep, let me cross, so I was grateful for that. When I had almost traversed the crosswalk, I noticed a Volkswagen Beetle Bug that was fast approaching. I didn’t think that it would collide with my body, and yet I was unmistakably wrong. One moment earlier I was on my bicycle racing to class, and now… now I was on my back, like a turtle, in a ditch. She had literally hit my body. She hit someone and probably didn’t even care. One could blame the fact that the sun was in her eyes, her brakes didn’t work, or she was an elderly woman who possessed bad eyesight. None of these issues were true. She was just a stubborn older woman in her mid forties to early fifties who was in a rush to get home. She had no excuses as to why she hit me, just simply sped around the curve, and “didn’t see me till it was too late”. You would think that it being a high traffic area that drivers would be cautious and let students cross without being a degenerate behind the wheel. She was a short woman with a bowl shaped red haircut. She blamed me for running in front of her car whenever it was she who needed desperately to let me cross. Her mom probably never taught her that pedestrians had the right of way. At home, her favorite game to play was most likely to run over her Barbie dolls with a rc toy car. It’d make more sense as to why she’d was to play bumper cars with me, a mere 130 pound boy. In any case, she fled the scene of the accident causing her to win 1st place in the Felony games. I’m still in the process of suing her to this day. And yet, there was something positive that came of this, aside from the free chiropractic care that I now must to go through weekly. It was this. From this day forward, God taught me and is still teaching me

Patience,

Enhancing my

Faith

And helping me to better manage my 

Time, 

Initially not to procrastinate.

When I got hit by the car the one thing that went through my head was feeling as though I was the Bludger that went through the hoop in Harry Potter. "5 Points for Slytherin" is what chanted through the streets in Jacksonville that faithful morning. Thank God I didn't have my arm broken by a dumb professor... instead I was hooked up to machine and a sling put on my arm before I was set free. I'll miss the bright blue sling, although it was fun while it lasted to watch TV in the comfort of my Pjs. Now I'm back to the study life of a college kid with stress and mayhem that runs amuck in my brain. O well, lets pray!

Due to this accident, I may or may not be afraid or hate the sight of Yellow Volkswagen Beetles!

Stupid Creepy Car is what you are!

A poem I just made up bout the Terror that struck my life and changed it forever!


The Yellow Abomination:

Round wheels of terror
Headlights of pain
all the problems you caused
making my brain collide with the pavement.

A hood of fury
windshield of force
the sorrow and misery
flew out eyes, like a horse in full stride.

I was distraught,
in fear of dyeing.
More or less I was afraid
of the afterlife and crying.

I wasn't ready for it to end my life.
I haven't jumped out of a plane
for goodness sake. Parachuting? Yay!
I needed more chapters in my life to do more things.

Like sail into the sunset in Maine.

Call me crazy?
Some people do.
This was the day I was hit by a car
and lived to tell my story to you.